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Walk a mile in someone else's shoes

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Sep 30, 2019
Queensbury, NY
The Pilot's Place has two rules:
  1. Play Nicely
  2. All posts about "politics and difficult subjects" need to go in the "politics and difficult subjects" forum.
The second rule is really just an outgrowth of the first one. Play Nicely is the DNA in this place's soul.

Some of you may have seen that a member of this forum lost his son a few days ago. While trying to cope with that awful, terrible reality, he was subjected to a personal attack here. It wasn't the typical kind of personal attack but was instead couched in non-personal language. Another way of stating that is that it was a particularly skilled personal attack, made with a scalpel instead of a knife.

From my point-of-view, The Pilot's Place failed at that moment. I failed, too, when I failed to see the attack and take action to remove it. Like most folks right now, I've been very busy but that's a reason and not an excuse. The Pilot's Place failed and I failed and for that I am terribly sorry. I'm pretty devastated that we could inflict more pain on someone we like a lot at one of the worst moments in any parent's life.

My goal for The Pilot's Place was originally and still is to have a place where pilots could come to enjoy conversations with fellow pilots and aviation enthusiasts about aviation and other subjects. A place where people would treat other people with respect and would refrain from the knife-wielding attacks that are so common on pilot forums and other forums across the web. A place where even politics and difficult subjects could be discussed civilly and with a goal of welcoming all points of view.

For the most part, we've succeeded in building that kind of community and I'm grateful for that. But we cannot slip back into complacency. Now, when so many people are hurting and fearful, we need to be especially careful to build our community through respect and by reaching out to one another instead of tearing it down through careless remarks or, worse, personal attacks. All of the relevant posts in the latest personal attack have been deleted and the poster has been suspended for a month but that is locking the barn door after the horse has fled.

If you find yourself about to post a careless remark or a personal attack, please stop and think for a moment about what might be going on in the life of the person you are about to attack. Please try to put yourself in the shoes they might be wearing right now. It's a tough time for a lot of people. Let's not make it harder for our friends.

Thank you.
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